Mystery Anxiety

Philippians 4:6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

My normal state of being does not include any anxiety. Yes, I have a wife and four daughters and a job with a lot of responsibility, but these things don't make me anxious. Problems come up, I solve the problems or the problems resolve themselves, and I move on. I have a reputation from my team at work for not worrying about anything, even presentations to Senior Executives or to hundreds of people. It just doesn't bother me. I get what anxiousness is about, but it is fairly alien to me.

In the last couple days, though, something has changed or happened, or I don't know what, but it is odd. I've had anxiety for nothing. Not, I have no anxiety, but I have the feelings of anxiety, but there doesn't seem to be any source. My chest has that stirred up, sickening tingling feeling you get when you are ready to fight, or an in a fight with someone, my head has that nagging feeling you get when you have forgotten something, but I don't seem to have forgotten anything. My thought race preparing for arguments I'm not in and can't imagine having, unless I start them. Over stupid things, with people I don't need to argue over stupid stuff about.

Because of the holiday, I have been around friends and family, my church family and others, but I haven't said anything. How do you start that conversation without feeling a little weird? This is the kind of stuff which drives me crazy when I am on the otherwise... So, you are worried about nothing, perhaps you should try not being worried. Is that anxiety helping you? What am I supposed to do for you? I've got a list of critical thoughts and comments for people plagued with non-problems. So, I've kept quiet.

This morning I had a call with one of my accountability partners, who I consider a bit of an expert on the topic. He would deny this, but he has the experience, even if it is at a different scale, I don't. It makes him a kind of safe person to present this sort of thing to.


The long and short of it is this, there is no point is trying to find the source, anxiety is not rational. You can handle genuine problems without anxiety (which is what I normally do) and you can create anxiety over imagined problems or nothing at all. The best course of action when you feel anxious is to stay the course and keep moving forward, sort of like the best recipe for failure is success. Trite, but true. Talk about it. It is a little like a release value to say I'm feeling anxious. I hate this one. I hate feeling of weakness and vulnerability which goes with admitting you "feel" anxious, yet even in the few minute conversation I had with him I started to loose some of the anxiousness. As I write this, I can feel it lifting too. You would think denial would be the better option, but it is not. Lastly, but probably most importantly, pray and have others pray for you. This is a human weakness which God has given us. It is not so we will stay weak and anxious, but we can find confidence through God. Let his strength replace our frailties.